#2WeeksWithTwuWuv

I'm off to see my sweetheart for 2 whole weaks! In which we have both our birthdays and the 4th of July.

There are no words for how much I need this Mini Break, but I'm going to try.

Lets see. Still no idea what my injury is. Still out on Workman's comp. That nonsense with Boston.

But now 2 weeks. 2 weeks with the one I love and all the furkids.

14 days of blessed time in the same space. To relax. To be with her. Updates will happen.

Ophelia Capulet: Haunted-A Piece of Fiction

Content Warning: Traumatic flashes, PTSD, References to Abuse

Those Jerks at 4B, Shapiro Building, the Boston Medical Center

So I began to explain how today's visit into Boston was a real fuster cluck. Here's the thing. The Saga continued. You see, at the beginning, upon learning I wasn't going to find the medical attention I needed on Cape Cod, my mother spoke with a trusted physician. Thus we received the name Tony Tannoury, an Orthopedic Specialist of The Boston Medical Center, Shapiro Building.

Obviously its been a lot of confusion, as mentioned, about whether its my neck or shoulder damaged and how. Which is why we should see a specialist. I had to give Doctor Tannoury's information to the primary Doctor on my case, and as I'm leaving the state in 5 days, was thrilled when three days ago Tannoury's office called me back to arrange an appointment.

Today, my mother with me every step of the way, I spent 60 dollars to get on a shuttle to the hospital in Boston. As mentioned, its a bit of a trek, easily an hour and a half, usually more. We knew for a single appointment for sed specialist it would cost us the day.

I walk in. I check in way early.

"You'll be seeing Dr. Nicoletta."

Doctor Nicoletta? My mother jumped to my defense, which is why I have an adultier adult along. I was just shocked and stunned, and clarified I had arranged the referral and appointment with Tannoury. I was told because Tannoury was a neck specialist, and my paperwork seemed to discuss my shoulder, so they made the appointment with Nicoletta instead.

While this is all sound thinking, they missed a very important step: discussing it with me, the patient. During the initial wait to talk to a higher up, I looked up Dr. Robert Nicoletta. His Health Grade was a whopping one out of five. If it had been higher, perhaps a three stars out of five, I might have said the hell with it.

However, obviously, it was not the case. Through assorted phone calls to patient advocacy, we had several conferences with people in the office. Eventually they said yes, I could probably see Dr. Tannoury. After about an hour they revealed actually no, the paperwork from my Workman's Comp insurance only covered a neck specialist. An hour and three or four conferences later.

I'm going to reiterated. I particularly requested Doctor Tannoury. I sent his information for the referral. I left a message saying that was who I wanted to see. I came here today, working out a way into the city, and suddenly I was told my appointment with Nicoletta instead. That was the big problem. That someone saw my file, decided I needed to see someone about my shoulder, not my neck, and neglected to tell me until I arrived. If it had been sooner, I could have called my workman's comp. If I had been notified I could have told them no, that's not who I wanted. I could have been spared time and sixty dollars. Instead, I had to come into the city, which for  the record, is painful. In general I spend a lot of time on my side or laying on my back. Sitting up for too long, as I am now, is sending spasms through my back, spine, and shoulders. After I'm done typing this up, I shall of course, take one of the pain pills I hate so much.

By the time we left, learning nothing could be done for us, we had a single request. We asked they call the main doctor on my case and tell him the reason they couldn't help me was because the Workman's Comp Insurance didn't authorize a neck specialist, believing the source of the pain was my shoulder.

Thus we slipped into the hall and chilled, because we would be trapped in the city for another few hours. My mother called back Patient Advocacy after a while. And then it went from poor professionalism and customer service to horrid.

My mother was told she was inappropriate in her reactions, and had frightened the staff, so they had refused the request. Irritated, we were. Upset? Certainly. Unhappy? Definitely. Thats what happens when an unwanted surprise puts you out sixty dollars and traps you in the center of the city, away from anything and everything we could check out. Also putting me, the patient they'd neglected to notify of the change, in back spasms and pains.

All in all, the offices were completely unprofessional, lied or exaggerated about our reactions, and the service was down right rude.

So. Friends. Family. Anyone who might pass through Boston and need medical attention. I cannot say this enough. Boston has many fine medical institutions. The Shapiro Medical Center on Albany Street is not one of them. My experience has been one of neglect, deceit, and a total lack of professionalism. This isn't even beginning to delve into their lack or organization and tendency to shrug off your words as uniformed. I told them I didn't want to see Dr Nicoletta because unlike Tannoury he had not been recommended to us. The only thing I could know about him was that his patients didn't reccomend him. I told them this at least half a dozen times and they kept trying to foist him on me.

Say No to Boston Medical Center. Avoid the Shapiro Building. Or at the very least, avoid the unprofessional jerks in suite 4B in the Shapiro Building of Boston Medical Center.

Compassion and Understanding

Growing up I never understood why my mother wouldn't just take her pain killing medication. As she was the victim of a series of car accidents, two or three by my count, she had perpetual injuries around her back and neck. She's had over 20 surgeries and is looking at what may be number 23. I understood and commiserated with most of her woes. Insurance companies did everything in their power to deny her claims as long as they could, hoping she would give up or die before it came to court. Doctors wouldn't pay attention to the real issue. However I could never understood why she would rather be in pain then take the medication to alleviate it. For a while I thought she was scared of being called an addict, which is understandable given our current culture.

Now I understand why. As some of you may know I injured myself at work back at the beginning of March. My right shoulder, attached to my primary arm, is now the home of a light burning ache almost always and if I used it too often, sharp stabbing pain. Doctors are no closer to figuring out why this is then they were four months ago. At this point an MRI has shown inflammation in my shoulder, but not  the cause. There is still some question whether or not my pain is somehow caused by injury in my neck. The only tests have been a single MRI and a useless X-Ray.

Trying to arrange a visit into Boston today to see a specialist (a particularly fine fuster cluck for another day) I felt myself enter a despair. I needed a copy of my MRI, and I hadn't even seen an image of it previously. All the offices were closed for the day, and the next couple days between then and when I would come into the city were looking particularly busy. My second of three hamsters had died, the third was on the way out, and my shoulder was throbbing with pain.

As I reached for my prescription bottle, I realized I resented needing it. I resented that on a day to day basis I needed to medicate my pain to get by. I resented that I was still injured, and that all I wanted was to be healed. I was depressed and angry that I was injured at all. I despaired and threw beanie babies at the wall and cried. Fortunately my mother was coming home from her own appointment with pizza.

I understand now.

She shouldn't have had to take the pills.

I shouldn't have to to take the pills.

We shouldn't have to worry about pain.

We should simply have to worry about being fixed.

I want to be fixed.

I want to be better.

I want my arm back.

I want my life back.

"One of his students destroyed it."

So now that Force Awakens is out on home video, I can rewatch till I get sick.

One thing I noticed

In my viewing in theaters I thought Kylo Ren killed a bunch of other Padawans or Apprentices ala Anakin.

This time I listened to Han explain.

Luke had been training a new generation of Jedi

And then one of them (Presumably Kylo) "Destroyed it"

Questions:

How many little Jedi?

How did he destroy it?

What if there were only two?

Ben Solo

And Rey

Origins of Rey aside she is obviously more powerful then Ren. Assuming he's 30 as said (I have my doubts but for theory)

Ren was born one year after Endor

Rey about eleven after.

According to Wikipedia.

Lets say what happened was Kylo Ren, influenced by Snokes, snuck Rey out and dropped her on Jakku. Perhaps jealous of the special attention she got from Luke.

Threatened by her ability, or maybe another Bullshit prophecy. Who knows.

Force Mind Tricks happen. All Kylo would need to do is jumble a young Rey's memory. Again, he has eleven years on her, so easily late teens or twenties.

Follow up: He knows about Rey on Jakku. When one of his followers speaks of BB8 having help from a girl, he reacts not with sexist frustration, nor another hissy fit. But alarm and question: "What girl?"

Thus Luke could have potentially taken off trying to find Rey, because "He felt responsible". But the universe is HUGE. Assuming Ben didn't run off right away.

Next up: Han Solo even thought about going to check Jakku to find the Falcon. But never did. Why?

Potentially a Force Mind Trick. Wouldn't be hard.

The extent he (Ren) fears Rey-he knows who she is. What she can become. What a danger she is. That he knows she is untrained.

Again, this is all conjecture and theory. But its mine.

The Future Does Scare Me

Hey world. The blog is getting quieter. No surprise. Life is normalizing. Also I'm still out on Workman's comp so day to day is pretty similar.

New DnD campaign has begun. That's been fun.

But... Orlando.

Its no secret. I'm a bisexual feminist Wiccan.

My heart goes out to the victims. My heart aches. I await anxiously word from a friend in Flordia who has a gay sister. They've taken day trips to Orlando before.

It was a hate crime.

Done by a deeply imbalanced individual.

Nothing more. Nothing less. It had nothing to do with his religion. Everything to do with hate.

I have-had a dear friend. I knew him since my freshman year of high school. My first day. We dated for a whole week back then.

He was always a little Red Neck. His dad had a yard of fallen cars littered with Beer Cans. A house that was a huge mess. Gun fanatics.

But the Racism didn't come out till he moved to Texas 5 years ago. It may have been why I shied away from Texas so severely.

I've realized Texas just draws out your inner self, be that good or bad. The one I love is from Texas. I wouldn't change a thing about her.

He went full on gun fanatic. Full on Racist. Hate boner for Muslims.

Today, after Trump tweeted about how this shooting proved him right about Muslims, I asked my friend to disavow him.

He wouldn't. He defended him.

I'm done. It sucks but I tried. I had already unfriended him. Now I have blocked him. On my phone. On Facebook. I will probably write him a final letter. No return address. Or a glitter bomb. Probably a glitter bomb.

It hurts. But I can't. Years of caring don't go away. But his hate trumps (oops) his care about my well being.

Take Care, Orlando. Take Heed, America. United we stand, divided we fall.

We all talk about revolution like it would be Fallout.

Or Walking Dead with less Zombies.

My mother reminded me of Margaret Atwood's "A Handmaid's Tale".

I am legitimately afraid of the future and what it may hold.

I've already talked about guns and Muslims and all that.

Today I just write

Bless.

Positivity Post

So the visit with Dad and his visit here were... Exhausting.

But today instead I give a shout out to the amazing independent game company

Three Minute Games
Creators of Lifeline,  its sequel Lifeline: Silent Night, Lifeline 2, and Lifeline: White Out.

Each story features you getting contact with a character who needs help, or even just someone to talk to. Interactive text based stories-choose THEIR adventure, and fates.

Lifeline and Silent Night star King Nerd, a lovable if awkward science intern named Taylor. His adventure begins when the spaceship he was working on his thesis crashed on a mysterious planet.

Lifeline 2 stars Arika, a Mage in Converse trying to save her brother and avenge her parents. I believe her world may be linked to Taylors. Also she is queen Nerd.

Whiteout stars Adams, who is an amnesiac in an artic area unknown. His future and past combine and a sequel is strongly hinted at.

They are amazing journeys. Do to the characters actively interacting and talking to you the emotional ante goes way up. Their voices are very natural and it helps me feel... Less alone when I play.

So spare a buck or two. Meet Taylor in his original adventure, or Arika in 2.

Dreadfort Bound

I know I haven't been blogging as much as usual lately.

Believe it or not that was a good thing.

I was happy. I was on Tumblr. Gaming. Wii Fitt. Redecorating. Writing.

But I'm going to need this blog for the next few days.

I'm going back to my childhood home where Dad is getting ready to move out.

Bolton Road.

Combined with the feelings of Dread when I return I nicknamed it after Roose Bolton's layer in Game of Thrones